I made it back to the USA for a while.
I’ve decided that flying is a miserable experience. I’m not afraid of flying. I just don’t like it. The average flight sees me stress out because I tend to be late to the airport. Despite the glorious infrastructure between Arlanda and Stockholm Central I manage to show up sweating, hustling along, and impatiently waiting as I get checked in with just a few minutes to spare. And I hate standing in line because I feel like I’m a piece of cattle being moved through the gates to be branded. So even before I’m at the gate I tend to be slightly annoyed with the experience. Then I sit patiently, usually reading (in fact the amount of reading I get done is one of the few benefits to flying). Then of course it is time to board. Which is always an experience. Because you never know who you’re going to get to sit by.
Because once again, just like last time, I ended up next to a rather large girl with bad breath. Seeing as how this has happened the last two times I’ve flown to the US I thought it might be me. I seemed to be the common denominator in this equation of bad breath. So I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. Mouthwashed even. Did the breath check into the hand. I was so fresh and so clean. And I came back to my seat. Only to find the girl had her face pointed right at me, dead to the world, her mouth hanging halfway open and breathing her death breath on me. It was somewhat of a relief to know that it wasn’t me. But that relief passed because the girl was able to sleep for about eight hours constantly exhaling death towards me. The funny thing was that when we landed she decided to put some gum in. I just wanted to scream at her that perhaps she could have done that when we took off instead of when we landed. But I’m much too nice for that. So instead I just bad mouth (see what I did there?) her anonymously on my blog.
Not only that but I had a sick person right in front of me. So sick that he even felt it necessary to tell the stewardesses that he had been vomiting, diarrheaing, and generally being on the brink of death right before getting on the plane. He just wanted them to know in case something happened. Awesome. And in front of him was a woman who was also sick. Coughing the whole time. And to top it off two old people got sick on the plane. One so bad that they had an ambulance waiting for the guy when we landed. Like I said, getting to your seat is always an experience.
I just hate the whole process. And I’ve also decided that airports are probably the worst first impressions of a country. No one wants to be there. Everyone is tired and haggard looking. Most people who are sitting around are annoyed because they have been waiting. It just doesn’t seem to be a good way to introduce someone to a country. Something needs to be done. Airports should hire happy, beautiful, smiling people to be sitting around as you disembark. I think it would put everyone in a better mood as they are delayed at O’Hare for three hours.
But either way. Here I am. In the US once again. So posting might be shoddy for a while. Consider it my Swedish vacation. Nothing happens in that country during the month of July anyway.
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