I’m having electrical problems. And I am not an electrician. Some things I’ll try to fix on my own, until I finally give-up and call an expert. Electricity is not one of them. This dates back to 7th grade and the Invention Convention when ACC and I decided to invent an electric lock, creatively called the Electrilock, not to be confused with Swedish Electrolux. We attached an old boat battery to a lock. Turns out old boat batteries have a bit of juice left in them. And boat battery juice hurts like hell when coursing through my 7th grade body in the safety of my garage.
This may explain a lot of things in my life. Like my earning a Bachelor of Arts degree and taking all of my science classes pass/no pass in college. It most definitely explains my hesitance to trying to fix anything electric.
This is one of the reasons why I have had only two working lights in my kitchen for about six weeks. Another reason being that I am lazy. For nearly six weeks I have cooked my evening meals by candle light. This is not romantic. This is not adventurous. It is ridiculous. What makes this worse is that I had asked a buddy of mine if he knew of any electricians. It just so happened he did. A friend of his was, in fact, an electrician.
This was about five and a half weeks ago. Because, despite my laziness, I don’t really like wielding knives and using stovetops in the dark. It doesn’t seem like a good idea. So I got a number. And never called. It sat in my phone for weeks. Five and a half weeks. In case you forgot.
Finally, I called on a Saturday. I did not expect an answer. In fact, I was just hoping for voicemail. At least then I could convince myself I made an effort. No one answered. So I left my message, explaining who I was, who told me to call, you know, the usual. It was a wonderful message. One of my better really.
Less than one hour later, the lights in my kitchen were working. Now you may think this is because the electrician manned up, got back to me immediately, and went out of his way to come help me out on a Saturday. You would be wrong. The electrician still hasn’t returned my call. But my lights work. I can’t explain why. Six weeks I flipped the lights on and off every day for those two lights. And nothing. One hour after calling the electrician my lights work. And have continued to do so.
My message was good, but I didn’t realize it was that good. I almost expect to get an invoice from the electrician any day now. Like he somehow had something to do with it.
Welcome to Sweden. Where the electricians are so good they don’t even come to you.