Thursday, June 10, 2010

Pick-Up Lines in Stockholm

As I mentioned earlier, while bitching and moaning about Americans, my younger brother is in town. We’ve gone out once or twice since he’s been here. A few days ago, we were out drinking one night, nothing too horribly exciting.

We had found another group of non-Swedes (a few girls and a few guys) that we were talking with. They were all taking a few days to explore Stockholm.

Nice enough people really. I happened to be talking to an Irish girl when suddenly another guy tapped me on the shoulder and asked if I was Irish. It’s got to be the bright orange beard. He was Swedish. I responded in Swedish, that no, I was not, but this girl was. And pawned her off on him. That’s just the kind of wingman I am. Even for people I don’t know.

Turns out, he was not appreciative of the girl being pawned off on him. Turns out he was gay. And turns out, asking if I was Irish, was his pick-up line. This was revealed to me later, by my loving brother, who had encouraged the whole situation.

CBCC had been asked if he knew me. He kindly said, yes, of course he did. We were brothers, perhaps he should talk to me. So the guy did just that. I guess he needed an ice breaker. Personally, I would have preferred being asked if it hurt. You know, when I fell from heaven. But instead, my orange beard was just too hypnotizing and he worked with what I gave him. Which was not much considering I immediately, and unknowingly, shot him down before turning back to the rest of the group and letting the gay man talk to the Irish girl.

Despite my hairy Village People chest, I’m not gay, and apparently, I have no sense whatsoever of people who are. I live my life oblivious to most things, and gay men trying to hit on me is one of them. In the end though, I’m just pumped someone tried to pick me up in a bar. It’s the little things really.

Welcome to Sweden. And bad pick-up lines.

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18 comments:

  1. Reminds me of this one: http://www.tjuvlyssnat.se/goteborg/just-becasue-we-actually-have-teeth

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  2. Oh that was so funny! I do hope you continue blogging once you're back in the states. Maybe a new one about settling back in? I'd read it!

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  3. It really is the little things that count. ;)

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  4. hmmm..maybe some gay men have a thing for red hair? I met a gay man once who only dated red-heads, claimed they taste better. hahah

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  5. YOu must be feeling better about yourself now :)
    and btw let's arrange some drinking considering you're such a nice wingman.
    (Tod)

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  6. A good pickup line ought to be like a good lawyer - one you can't off hand say 'No' to.

    *Sigh. Agreed, this one is a particularly bad one.

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  7. Is the orange beard a beacon for gay men :P I think you should be flattered, and go for the man, and give me the phone number for the Irish girl LMAO!! :P

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  8. There are no "Pick-up lines" only openers or conversation-starters. Imagine if there were pick-up lines, you could get any girl you want with a few words. It would be like a spell :)

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  9. ", I would have preferred being asked if it hurt. You know, when I fell from heaven. "

    Using pathetic pick up lines like those old classics most likely wont work in Sweden. I know they dont work on me.
    Do you really use ém in the states?

    /Maria

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  10. @Linus – indeed.

    @anonymous – I love it!

    @MadEnglishWoman – I think I will definitely keep it up, I have way too much fun with it to quit I think.

    @’Drea – exactly, and being hit on, regardless of the sex works for me.

    @Juni – maybe… unfortunately for the gay men out there, I’m not gay.

    @anonymous (Tod) – Im basically like Goose in Top Gun. Except for the dying in a horrible flying accident.

    @Jil Jil – this one was not good… unfortunately.

    @Merlin – Well, it may be, but Im not in the mood to shave. Or turn gay.

    @anonymous – well then this was a particularly bad opener and or conversation starter.

    @anonymous (Maria) – I have never used a pick up line. In fact, I usually don’t even talk to girls in bars. You guys intimidate me.

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  11. That was a pick-up line? What the hell, lol.

    Faen meg det dumeste ever!! :D

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  12. Top Gun. The movie which the main actress later revealed she was homo.
    I can't see how it's gonna work for your buddy!

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  13. now if only someone would pull the youve lost that loving feeling

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