I live by myself. After four years in college with roommates, I was of the opinion that roommates were a good thing. They helped pay rent. They put food in the fridge that you could surreptitiously steal. They gave you someone to talk to so you didn’t talk to yourself. All good things really.
Then I moved to Sweden and after a while became a horribly selfish person that lived in an apartment the size of a large bathroom and talked to himself. Something needs to break the silence right? And admit it, talking to yourself is awesome. You always agree. You’re always right. Granted, you should never do it around others, turns out people look at you funny. Who knew?
So when I moved to the great Midwest, I did not look for a roommate. I found an apartment three times the size of the one I had in Stockholm for less money. I had room to move. Of course, I could no longer sit on my couch and cook all at the same time, but I’m not sure that’s a bad thing.
The problem is I have carpeting. Wall-to-wall carpeting. Something that I never realized was so ubiquitous in this country until three years in Sweden. There I could get away with a broom and a dust pan. Everything was some sort of hard floor. Whether it was wood or nasty linoleum, a broom would suffice. Here, carpet is everywhere. While it is quite nice on my feet, it causes a cleaning problem. One which can only be solved with a vacuum cleaner. A dust sucker if you will.
I have been in my apartment for well over four months. I did not own a vacuum cleaner until about a week ago. You do the math. I have never been more excited to vacuum. Ever. I had begun to use my feet as vacuum cleaners, walking barefoot to let whatever nastiness may have accumulated on the floor to stick to my feet. Did I mention that I was single? Seriously, I’m a catch. I would then stand over the trash can and wipe my feet off. It was strangely satisfying, but not at all effective.
Technology is amazing, and an old vacuum cleaner donated by my parents made its way to the great Midwest. Finally. Since, I have vacuumed twice in hopes of fighting through the accumulation of gunk. It’s working. Slowly, but surely. And I am assimilating to the carpeted ways of the US.
Welcome to Swedish-America. And the single life.
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